Tornus

Good morning! I’m Tornus, a Seattle-based kink educator, activist, community builder, and rationalist.

Current Projects

I run Full Circle Kink, which teaches kink in Seattle and online. We are particularly known for teaching introductory rope bondage as well as a variety of technical topics ranging from technical rigging to defamation law.

I serve on the steering committee of NARIX, the North American Rope Innovation eXchange. We are a twice-a-year peer-to-peer conference that brings together dedicated rope lovers from across the continent to share, learn, discuss, and experiment with the many facets of rope bondage.

I run Meerkat Agenda, a group dedicated to helping kink communities live up to their full potential. Our first project is Rope in Seattle, a curated guide to bondage in Seattle.

Writing

I write a lot, in part as a way of organizing my thinking. Here are a couple of my better pieces:

Not a Checklist is a different way of thinking about negotiation checklists. It’s the most popular thing I’ve ever written.

The Three Goals Model of Accountability encapsulates some of the most important things I’ve learned from being involved in a ton of accountability processes.

Past Projects

I was part of the team that produced the Kink Education Code of Conduct.

I co-founded and ran Suspended Animation, a Burning Man camp focused on suspension bondage.

I wrote software in a past life and had the good fortune to work with some incredibly talented people. We left some pretty good dents in the universe.

About me

I’m fiercely idealistic: most of my projects are focused on making the world a better place. My core values are rationality, integrity, kindness, and coordination.

I believe kink communities can be vibrant, nourishing, and humane—but they generally aren’t. I spend a lot of time trying to fix that.

I’m in two very serious long-term relationships and have a rope practice partner. I don’t play with anyone else.

I consider social media to be largely toxic and I mostly avoid it. My focus is on in-person communities, walled gardens, and the free web.

As a kink educator, I adhere to the Kink Education Code of Conduct.

Consent and accountability

As a professional kink educator, I adhere to both KECC (Kink Education Code of Conduct) and KEMS (Kink Education Minimum Standards). I have no KEMS-mandated disclosures.

Consent and accountability are fundamental to my worldview as well as to my professional work.

I’m fortunate to have some fantastic—and highly reputable—people on my accountability circle and serving as my consent consultant. They support me in living up to my ideals and are the best people to talk to if you have questions about me or my history.

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